My Star

Ideals are like stars,

we will not succeed in touching them with our hands,

not yet....

But like the seafaring man on the desert of waters,

we can choose them as our guides,

and following them,

we will reach our goal.

Contemplation

Homage to the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha,
Guide of my Life and Light of my path,
Entrusting in the Great Compassion of the Buddha

and the Truth of the Dhamma,

May I shed the selfishness in myself,
Transforming myself into a conduit of Love.

May I be rid of the foolishness in myself,
Gaining wisdom to be Virtuous.

May I be medicine for the sick and weary,
Helping to Nurse their afflictions until they are better;

May I provide food and drink,
for those in need,

May I protect the helpless and the poor,

whenever I can,

May I too be a lamp,
For those who need Your Light,

May I be an oasis for those who need rest,
and guide seekers to the Other Shore.

May all find happiness through my actions,
and let no one suffer because of me.

Whether they love or hate me,
Whether they hurt or wrong me,
May all realize the Truth of the Dhamma,
and realize Supreme Nibbana.

Sadhu! Sadhu! Sadhu!

--

Love vs Metta

"LOVE”

One can easily speak of “love” – yet, its level, range and quality may differ widely.

From the Greeks, are derived three forms of “love”; eros, philos and agape.

“Eros” is the basal, carnal acts of lust. Hence, the term “erotic”.

“Philos” is a sort of fraternal relationship between friends and colleagues, or a sense of intrinsic love toward certain fields of academic learning.

And “agape” is the feeling of religious fellowship in common spiritual “communion”.

However, all these forms of love have “self” and attachment in them.

Love, in the worldly sense, is a product of passion. Without passion, one cannot love. Without a selfish motive, one is not inclined to love. And all worldly love has the element of “self” in it – one loves because of one’s Self. And this sort of love tends to produce greater attachment. When this love is lost, it turns to hatred. Or when this love is missing, it frustrates one.

In German, the word passion is made up of 2 words: create and suffering. Passion in German is leidenschaft. leiden means to suffer and schaft (root word is schaffen) means to create. And there is this saying, Leidenschaft ist die Eifersucht, die Leiden schaft. Passion is the enthusiasm that creates suffering.

When people come together sexually, they would do certain acts which they would normally not do. At the moment when they are engrossed in sex, they accept situations which are primal. Sexual indulgence in its mannerisms and behaviorisms cannot be eliminated from that of the instinct of the animal.

Platonic love is of a nobler level. It is love manifested not by physical association of the body and body, or of wanting to be physically together, but of mental association. Whatever the distance, or barrier, such a relationship is able to produce the most beautiful correspondence and richest poetry, which can exist for all time. And yet, this platonic love need not necessarily be developed in a sensual manner or as men to women. This form of love has no attachment involved and has an enormous quality of dispassion that it does not lead one to states of frustration when the object is not present, and it does not put one into moods of animosity.

Marriage

Within marriage is that type of sexual relation which is approved as legitimate in a society.

And it is meant to continue beyond sexual satisfaction as this relationship has to provide the basis for the care of the offspring and to constitute the socio-economic unit of a household. The accepted form of marriage in modern societies is the monogamous marriage in the sense of a union between one man and one woman involving a total communion of life between the partners and meant to persist for the entire duration of their joint lives.

Family

It has been customary to speak of the historic functions of the family as economic, educational, religious, recreational, protective, and affectional. Of these, only the affectional survives in the modern family; except in the most limited degree, the others having been taken over by communal agencies. Thus industry is no longer found in the home; the educational responsibilities for the child after six or even earlier has been transferred to the school; recreation has for the most part been commercialized; and religious institutions have largely taken over the religious function. Many experts have taken this loss of the functions of the family as the cause of its increasing instability.

The affectional aspect of family life still maintains its vital function. As modern life has grown more complex, social relations less direct, social distance greater, reactions more stereotyped and conventional, the individual has turned more and more to affectional satisfactions expressed through intimacies and demonstrations of affection, sympathy, sharing of aspirations, common goals, etc., whose locale is the family. The focusing of attention upon this function, so intimate and emotional in character and thus naturally fraught with possibilities of conflict, has placed such a premium upon its attainment as to cause the success or failure of family life to be measured in these terms alone.

Parenthood

An often-neglected function of the family is that of personality-development. The family has been spoken of as the cradle of personality in that it is the first group which the child enters and it is here that his personality is moulded through interaction with family members, the whole constituting a unity of interacting personalities.

Motherhood is a term applied to the experience of performing the function of caring for the needs of the young child by the mother. Usually, it includes the biological experience of giving birth to the child, the early satisfying of the needs of the infant, and its emotional development until maturity. Traditionally, motherhood has been thought of as a woman’s primary role and the greatest honour accorded her has been for this function. Ancient cultures have glorified motherhood, even though women’s status has been low, legally, socially and religiously.

With the emancipation of women leading to work outside the home, more careers open to them, motherhood in a more limited sense has come to be recognized in many groups, and a part of the traditional function has been transferred to others. She is no longer expected to spend all of her time with her child; in fact, modern psychology cautions against over-attachment, over-solicitude, and projection her own ideas and aims upon the child. It is because of the early intimate associations between the mother and the child that the mother exerts a profound effect upon the personality pattern the child develops and his later social adjustments.

Loving-kindness

Sex is an inalienable aspect of being human. The aim of Buddhism is to understand the self. And this so-called “self” is made up of Mind and Body. So is sex. In other words, sex is not purely mechanical or "physical". One need not participate physically to be sexually-inclined. Though one may be impaired by some physical sexual handicap (e.g. impotence) or prohibited by social-religious conventions (e.g. the celibacy of a monk), one’s mind may be imbued with sex. For those who wish to abstain from sex, the mind has, therefore, to be taken away from sex, too.

Sex is a conditioned faculty inherited through past Kamma. It has no divine aspect as some religions attribute to it. Marriage, from the viewpoint of the Dhamma, is a social and not a religious issue. The sex act itself is not sanctified but Is regarded as a biological means to satisfying a natural desire. Buddhism advises against the misuse and abuse of sex in that it almost always leads to insatiety and mental instability of the person. It is in this spirit that Buddhists observe the Precept: “I observe the Precept against sexual misconduct: “Kamesu micchacara veramani sikkhapadam samadiyami".

Buddhism neither promotes nor condemns sex. The decision rests with the parties concerned to consider the possible repercussions and consequences which may threaten the harmony of one’s marital and social status. Buddhists view the sexually-inclined with compassion and understanding, knowing them to be victims of a natural desire. Even to the married, Buddhism advises timely and periodic observance of chastity through the Precept of celibacy (Abrahmacariya veramani sikkhapadam samadiyami). Moral looseness is not an inexorable crime but in it lies the potentiality for furthering one’s life in this seemingly perpetual cycle of birth and death (samsara).

Platonic love for one another is noble indeed. But a detached form of “loving-kindness” (metta) to all beings is the highest! While platonic love is essentially restricted to individuals or groups of individuals, loving-kindness is a universal “radiation”.

Loving-kindness/ Metta is a quality of the heart so detached from sensual objects, yet developed by a person toward every object. Unlike any other type of love, loving kindness has no inkling of self at all. Love is the expression of one’s personality because of one’s intrinsic affinity for another. Loving-kindness is the expression of love through another’s personality. This is to say that one is integrated with that person and wishes that person well as one would wish oneself. Loving-kindness is a pure atmosphere which one creates, cleansed of baser states and void of Self.

May all beings be happy and well.

TQ Tammy

Prayer

What is Buddhist Prayer?

'I seek not thy refuge for the sake of gain,

Nor because of fear of thee,

nor for the love of fame,

Nor for divine favours or undeserved position,

But drawn by the power of boundless love and Compassion,

And thy all-embracing peerless wisdom,

The vast Samsara's sea safe to cross,

I bend low, O lord, and become thy devotee.

I take Refuge in the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha.

Sadhu! Sadhu! Sadhu!'.

The purpose of Buddhist prayer is to awaken our inherent inner capacities of strength, compassion and wisdom rather than to petition external forces based on fear, idolizing, and worldly and/or heavenly gain.

Buddhist prayer is a form of meditation; it is a practice of inner reconditioning. It replaces the negative with the virtuous.

It inspires our hearts towards wisdom and compassion for others and ourselves. It allows us to turn our hearts and minds to the beneficial, rousing our thoughts and actions towards Awakening. Constant and repetitive wholesome thoughts when intentionally cultivated becomes us, we become what we believe, we are the result of our causes and conditioning.

Fairness and Peace

For society to become peaceful, each unit within society has to become peaceful. To the Vajjian republic, the Buddha gave the following advise:

As long as they maintain their unity and meet regularly, they will remain invincible.
As long as they meet together in unity, rise in unity and perform their duties in unity, they will remain invincible.
As long as they do not transgress their ancient principles of good governance and their system of justice, they will remain invincible.
As long as they revere, respect, venerate, and honour their elders and pay regard to their words, they will remain invincible.
As long as they protect their women and children, they will remain invincible.
As long as they venerate the objects of worship inside and outside their republic, and maintain monetary support for them, they will remain invincible.

There were many different sects and traditions in those days as now, with their own temples and places of worship. Wisdom lies in keeping ALL people happy and satisfied. None should be subject to harassment, which would only serve to make them become enemies of the favoured. All places of worship should receive adequate protection and respect. The rulers must provide protection and support to saintly people irrespective of their faiths. A good moral person is a good moral person irrespective of his religious label.

This wise counsel of the Buddha is badly needed today to maintain peace and harmony.

The Buddha's commitment to ideal republican virtues is strong. In the Maha-parinibbana-sutta, Ajatasastru, the King of Maganda, wishes to destroy the Vajjian confederacy (the Licchavis) and sends a minister, Vassakara the Brahman, to the Buddha to ask his advice. Will his attack be a success?

Rather than answer directly, the Buddha speaks to Ananda:

"Have you heard, Ananda, that the Vajjians hold full and frequent public assemblies?"

"Lord, so I have heard," replied he.

"So long, Ananda," rejoined the Blessed One, "as the Vajjians hold these full and frequent public assemblies; so long may they be expected not to decline, but to prosper...”

The Buddha saw the virtues necessary for a righteous and prosperous community, whether secular or monastic, as being much the same. Foremost among those virtues was the holding of “full and frequent assemblies.”

In this, the Buddha spoke for justice, democracy and virtue. He promoted a democratic system of administration well before the Westminister model, in that he argued for a wide rather than narrow distribution of political rights, and government by discussion rather than by command and submission, the mechanism being the parliament of full and frequent assemblies.

--

My Prayer today

I go for refuge to the Buddha.

I seek the presence of the Exalted Teacher by whose compassion I may be guided through the torrents of Samsara,

by whose serene countenance I may be uplifted from the mire of worldly thoughts and cravings,

seeing there in the very assurance of Nibbanic Peace, which He himself attained.

In sorrow and pain I turn to Him and in my happiness I seek His tranquil gaze.

I lay before His Image not only flowers and incense, but also the burning fires of my restless heart, that they may be quenched and stilled,

I lay down the burden of my pride and my selfhood, the heavy burden of my cares and aspirations,

the weary load of this incessant birth and death.

Sadhu! Sadhu! Sadhu!

Big Ignorant Children

The Buddha's teachings are statements of things as they truly are!

This contrasts greatly with the very devotional/ religious aspect that we see in traditional temples; all the images, candles, incense, etc are the outcome of people's need to indulge into the religious aspect, of prayers, rituals and devotion.

But when we objectively study the Buddha's discourses, we find ourselves very remote from all that.

The Buddha is a discoverer. He is a scientist who discovers something: he does not make a religion out of it. He discovered many aspects of nature, the mind, man and society, many truths that we either do not see or choose to deny, and he taught these discoveries to his students so that they can be better people. His pupils listen and learn, and most importantly seek out the truth of his findings by themselves in their own experience.

We are students of the Dhamma who listen to his teaching. We try to understand our Mind and body, and once we understand, we live our lives in harmony with nature and in the process improve ourselves.

Thus, there are no petitional prayers, no rituals, no invocation of divinities. We do not expect anything from anyone else other than from ourselves. It is all about work to do on ourselves such that we evolve to be better beings. It is mainly a work of understanding and wisdom, because in fact, we are nothing else but big ignorant children.